Part 3: The Letter…

Photo Credit: Stormseeker

By this time, there was very little doubt that we needed to get real answers, and have him evaluated.   The weight of his anxiety was crushing, and he was drowning – our effervescent little boy disappearing.  Unfortunately, the wait would at minimum be a year if we went through the school system - realistically, much more.  Done privately, the options existed, but it would be a struggle financially as these tests often run into the thousands of dollars. 

Through grace, we were able to find a connection to get my son the help he needed, and so I penned my letter…

Photo Credit: Florian Klaur

Dear….

 I am writing to you for your help if possible.

 I always knew and understood that my son was a contextual learner.   My husband and I understood that for him to be engaged, or focused on learning, things often needed to be explained or put into a context that interested him - otherwise, he'd prefer to “daydream”.

Grade 2 has been a harder transition for my son than my husband and I anticipated.   He has always struggled with reading, despite his love of books, and this year, is struggling with school work - both in class and at home. Not being able to read the instructions affects his ability to work independently, and his “daydreaming” often means he's missing important parts of the instructions or learning.  The earlier years were predominantly focused on play-based learning and so he was able to navigate through them with lovely teachers.  Some of his struggles, we thought, were associated with being in French Immersion and learning the language.  With Grade 2, and the heavier work load, things are more clear that my husband and I might need more tools to help him to ensure that he doesn't fall too far behind.   

As parents we aren't concerned about grades and are happy to be patient and let him learn at his own pace.  The problem is that my usually happy-go-lucky-kid lately seems to be coming home more frustrated, seemingly more stressed, and more embarrassed about not being able to complete his school work in class, or not understanding the instructions to complete his work.   The stress and anxiety is what my husband and I want to ensure doesn't fester and grow.    I suspect he may have dyscalculia - a term I only learned about in October of last year.  My son has always struggled with the concept of numbers, time and money, and I'm wondering if his reading struggles may be associated with that.  

I've had many conversations with him regarding his reading to see if dyslexia may be an issue.  I ask if the letters move around when he tries to read, or flip around, or change in appearance in any way, but when asked he says no and when asked to spell words, he's always been able to spell the words correctly and make their sounds.  He does still mix up his 'b’s'“ and “d’s”.  I'm not entirely convinced dyslexia is the root cause of his reading problems...but something is.

Of course there is a whole range of issues that may be the source of his academic struggles or a combination.....and that is why I'm reaching out to you.   The teachers are limited in their time and resources and I can't be in the classroom to help him, so it's hard.  I know that testing is sometimes needed.  I know that testing can be a long and expensive process.    The only thing I'm certain of, is that my son is such a bright and happy boy, and my husband and I want to make sure that school and learning doesn't develop into a source of stress and anxiety for him.

Sincerely, Braiins

And then we waited….and COVID hit.